I’m not going to discuss the many psychological theories for rape fantasies. What I am going to do is explain why analyzing them in certain ways is problematic. David Ley, a regular writer at AVFM recently wrote about rape fantasies and his reasons for why they occur. What resulted was a comment section of men, misogynist men, normalizing rape as an evolutionary strategy. It reminds me of the adage about tools. You can use a hammer to build wonderful things but you can also use that hammer to hurt people. MRA’s hurt people.
MRA’s shouldn’t go near this topic because inevitably they display their utter contempt for women. Judgybitch even got in on this and said that she can’t dream about having sex with Ben Affleck because it’s cheating so she fantasizes that he rapes her. This is the most childish shit I’ve ever read. I think she says things like this to impress the guys, to let them know she’s ok with being treated as a doormat and that her entire existence revolves around male power. What woman hasn’t fantasized about sex with others even when in a committed relationship? Some of us do but we don’t consider it cheating.
MRA’s are now talking about how women are naturally submissive and if women fantasize about masochism the poor males get blamed for it. This is the problem with putting a hammer in their hands. They’ll either find a way to become the victims or they’ll make up biological theories that place women as inferior.
They also talked about the ‘old’ definition of rape which hasn’t changed at all. Most of them complained about having to obtain consent not realizing that consent IS the crux on which the crime depends.
‘Men are by nature, the dominant sex. The feminists deny reality for equality because it’s a way of coping with their feelings, that’s why they think a mere fantasy is symptom of some terrible patriarchal boogeyman. It goes well with the leftist belief that everything is socialized, and therefore changeable.’~ W.Gao
These abnormal men then try to naturalize rape fantasies by endorsing Elliot Rodger’s ideas:
‘Ive personally seen wealthy respectable women drop their panties in a new york minute when soda comes around bullying the F*&k ……..out of everyone that steps in his path!!!’
The idea that women only sleep with men who are violent and crude was the nucleus around which Elliot Rodger’s entire rage-filled manifesto revolved. The idea that women ruin the world by only sleeping with bad men is a common theme to MRA’s. Stefan Molyneux actually blames all the world’s problems on women who sleep with ‘assholes.’
Then there’s the idea that women are the oppressors of men because we ‘gatekeep’ sex. This idea is straight out of the Warren Farrell playbook and it does show MRA’s as men who are incompetent in having any kind of relationship with a woman, be it sexual or otherwise.
‘Generally speaking, the sexual dynamics between male and female is about the female having the power and control. As Tom Golden said, it’s the competer and chooser situation, where men compete against each other in the hope of getting chosen by women. This gives women the power of making sex a commodity they can supply as sparingly as they wish. Male-on-female rape is breaking this rule where the supplier has this commodity taken by someone she does not approve, and rape fantasy, to my mind, is the imagined loss of this control and power, by exercising control and power within her mind.’
This mental twisting into female blame is precisely what MRA’s do so well. You really have to be careful what ideas you allow them to play with but it does demonstrate their woman hatred and their inability to handle mature topics.
I think rape fantasies in women might be due to the fact that we are the gender that actually gets raped and threatened with rape. It might be a way to cope with the inevitable. We know as women that men, all men, have the potential to rape us within our structurally unequal society. It may be a way for women to control the inevitable rape, the rape that happens to many many women in peacetime and as a weapon of war. Rape is committed by men we know, men we trust.
Men don’t seem interested in stopping rape as a practice of oppression. Instead, they use the phenomenon of the female rape fantasy as a backdrop to normalize rape. David Ley suggested that these fantasies are coping mechanisms that show that women aren’t truly devastated after being violated. He thinks we should eliminate the disease model around rape and rape fantasies. He thinks that therapists and community organizations actually make rape worse by explaining how horrific it is. This circular reasoning is common in men because they don’t have to worry the way women do.
This is the typical male stance that normalizes rape as something women don’t really have a hard time with. Men preach that rape truly isn’t that bad because I think it makes them feel absolved of any responsibility in stopping it. If men can normalize rape as something that naturally happens they have no reason to want to end it. Ladies, how many times have you heard a man say that rape is an evolutionary way of continuing the species? If I had a dollar for. . .
Rape works for all men to keep all women in a state of fear. The fact that MRA’s normalize it and accuse women of lying about it means they don’t take it seriously, and why would they? Dean Esmay claims our culture is full of rape hysteria and that women are just worried too much. I should point out to the inept Dean Esmay that this fear is valid. The more men normalize rape into an inconsequential act they have no intention of stopping, women will remain afraid.
When only half the human race cares about a problem the other half commits without any sign of stopping it’s not unusual to be afraid.
Men can stop rape. If they want to.