There was only going to be one of two defenses to the Buzzfeed article that confirmed what most knew about Paul Elam already: a deadbeat dad many times over, a drug and alcohol addict that got arrested several times, a racist, a child hitter (of a boy), a rape apologist, and a financial leech of women.
In less than 24 hours Elam’s response on AVFM had over 200 comments and rising. Looks like Buzzfeed hit a nerve. Elam even admitted that after the story was published he had a sleepless night.
After a long, emotional and sleepless night last night, I am no less committed to seeing this through than I was the day before. Nothing has changed, except perhaps that some of you know me a little better now.
The first responses were spewed forth by Dean Esmay on the comment section of the article itself. He basically counter attacked Adam Serwer.in a classic case of projection and then leaned on the Gamergate mantra of ‘journalistic ethics’. It must be understood that Elam was contacted to give his side to Buzzfeed and chose to be an asshole mostly saying it was none of their fucking business.
‘Server, who showed himself to be filled with rage and contempt towards the attendees of the International Conference on Men’s Issues, refused to answer questions himself…It’s clear what Server’s motivation here is: revenge, using Buzzfeed as his mouthpiece, for the fact that he was exposed as a hack journalist 6 months ago on our pages…Serwer’s co-authored it with a hate-filled feminist with a record of making unsubstantiated allegations herself.
Dean doesn’t understand that journalists are the ones that ask the questions and the interviewee responds. We can dismiss the ‘hate-filled feminist’ as she’s not the racist deadbeat dad who hits little kids. This is an example of the entitlement MRA’s have. Also, it’s not really evidence of hack journalism when the source is AVFM. Just saying.
On AVFM it’s a similar yet different response. Sage Gerard, who has the highest rated comment basically just shot the messenger and reassured AVFM’s donators that Paul isn’t rich. Gotta keep that money flowing in.
Oh, and god help us all if Paul decides to run A Voice for Men for a living. If something eats 70-80+ hours of your week, you can’t hold down a fucking job on top of that. Where do you think his food comes from? Do you think a unicorn delivers a feast to his house every day? To you fucktards who hate Paul so much, remember that I’ve been in the man’s house. He doesn’t have gold hubcaps, bitches and hos funded by us suckers, it’s just like any other lower middle class house.~Sage Gerard of Zen Men
I’m sure all the Skype conversations with Elam’s big team he never pays takes 80+ hours a week. His daughter admitted he spent all his time on the computer trolling. So no, you can’t hold a job down when all you do is sit online and write angry misogynist screeds and collecting money while your arse goes numb. Well, maybe you can.
‘When Elam was on the road, he would entertain himself by participating in what Bonnie called “internet troll wars” about men’s rights. Elam has said that he “started AVFM from a semi truck, with a laptop, driving 10, 12 hours a day.” (“I’m a determined person,” he told BuzzFeed News.)’
Not determined enough to get a job and stop making other men pay for his computer trolling time I suppose.
But there’s a bit of a twist here. Elam sent an email to his daughter in 2010, when the site was up and running and he was raking in money every quarter, hand over fist. The email to her:
‘I am struggling to find work, living off Stacy and have used up every dime of savings. I am in a state so bad the only thing I can compare it to is when I was shooting dope. I have buried myself in writing because it numbs the pain and makes me think of other things, like instead of feeling like a failure.’
This is very odd since in June of 2010 Elam started AVFM but was editing Men’s News Daily just prior. Did MND collect donations? How much money did Elam make from that?
In 2011 Elam was having very successful fundraisers on AVFM and when you read the following, you understand why Elam didn’t go back to work.
When Stacey’s father died in 2011, the couple moved into the apartment her father had been living in, according to public records. Eventually, Bonnie said, the two weren’t even dating — she called them “roommates” — Bonnie said he was driving Stacey’s car and spending Stacey’s money. He didn’t go back to truck driving.
Elam had several fundraisers in 2011 starting with 2 fundraisers in February. He had another one in June where he asked for 5 thousand and another in December where he cleared $5,600. There’s no way to check on how much he actually made but with most fundraisers he usually reached his goal and then some. So the question must be asked: why was he making his daughter pay his phone bills when he was 1) living with a woman who had an income he was living off of as stated above and 2) was more than likely fundraising on MND and definitely doing it early 2011?
The other fact is that while he was living in an apartment in 2011 he quickly used the donations to buy a home where he now lives. This new home is downplayed by another MRA leech Sage Gerard, who runs a campus MRA group called Zen Men. Sage Gerard just cleared $7K when he lives at home. Add on another $13K just prior to the KSU gathering and he’s got a lot of money. He claimed the money was to keep him from dipping into his tuition and to feed him but he lives at home.
‘One month without your support, and it would be impossible to keep up with my tuition payments, let alone feed myself.’
I suppose it was for food?
His daughter clearly knows he’s a leech and doesn’t contribute anything financially in his relationships. Drug and alcohol addicts take and take and of course in Elam’s case I’m sure he had to shell out expenses for his multiple arrests which his girlfriend probably paid.
And finally, in 2014 after collecting hundreds of thousands of dollars, Elam sent his public representative Dean Esmay on a major news network with a missing tooth and a horrible suit when he could’ve easily helped another man with a few thousand dollars to fix his tooth. Other men besides Elam, paid for that too. The bill was a measly 3K.