My call for Indian women was answered but not in the way I intended. I watched a TEDX talk by Deepika Narayan Bhardwaj. She is a men’s rights activist and her talk was about dowry. She thinks women are abusing men by filing false dowry related complaints. Sounds like the MRA’s and false rape claims yet? Yeah, that’s what I thought.
My first question to her was to ask her whether she acknowledged that dowry was the result of patriarchy in India, you know, the idea that women are objects or property to be bought and sold?
She refused to answer that question. She wasn’t about to be honest with me.
Instead this is what she said to me:’
you and (i dunno whether ur a woman or a man) …people like you are a disgrace to every beautiful relationship between a man and a woman. I guess males in ur home think like that. Not mine. Not my father. Not my brother. Not my friends. You mean a woman should be sent butt naked to next home? You mean a father and mother have no responsibility of a daughter just because they married her? Dowry was always a right of a woman from her own home. Sickos like you distorted the very meaning of it because for you greedy souls everything that is of a husband and his family is your lottery. Are you yourself a pimp who buys and sells women? Or you are a prostitute who earns for her ownself but blame the society for putting her in it even tho she chose to. Yez i will never agree that men view women as object, when they do, she herself is making an object out of her….walking semi nude on roads. You and i wud never agree. So adios
That wasn’t enough for her. Before I could respond she shot back:
LOL and leeches in india are taking millions just after few months of marriage!!! Stop bullshitting
perfect trait of a dumb feminist
It’s pretty typical that she accuses me of doing all sorts of horrific things rather than answer my straightforward question. Men’s rights activists never answer direct questions. It reminds me of Karen Stringbeanhead telling everyone on Youtube the other day that feminists love Conservatives aka Republicans and want to implement their policies.
I didn’t even have a chance to give my opinion of dowry, which if she could have a logical, normal conversation without flipping the fuck out I would’ve absolutely said I disagree with dowry. People should marry for love, not put prices on women’s bodies to marry them off, which is what patriarchal Indian society does. She couldn’t admit that so she just went nuts with accusations and crazy talk. Insulting me personally doesn’t win an argument Deepika.
I searched Google for this phrase ‘dowry a result of patriarchy’ and got LOTS of articles explaining just that. The first article describes the murder of women due to dowry related issues as well as the disfigurement of women by men through acid attacks. The second article is more about how patriarchy functions to harm women. Bride burning is what Indian suffer when the dowry monies aren’t being paid to her husband and his family. Women are burdens in India but Deepika refuses to acknowledge these facts.
What also disturbs me about Deepika was her off the rails rant. Her idea that women are choosing to be prostitutes and then adding in some rape apology for good measure is exactly why she’s a misogynist working against women’s liberation. Lots of other MRA creeps are on her video praising her so it’s not exactly rocket science that her shitty view of women results in their adoration of her.
Men don’t want to know WHY they suffer. They suffer because women do. Once you liberate the half of the population that the other half has objectified, infantilized, fetishized and therefore oppressed, life will get a lot better.
Men don’t want that though. They want to keep control and domination. They want a fresh supply of women to subjugate economically so that a new crop of 14 year old girls will walk the streets as prostituted so their precious dicks have holes and then turn around and blame the women for it. They also want to ‘protect’ women which really means control them. They want patriarchy. It’s old. It’s been around for a long time. It’s comfortable having all the power. They won’t give it up without a serious fight and that’s what feminists have been doing for hundreds of years, nay thousands.
Women did not invent dowry. Women did not invent chivalry. Women do not benefit from ANY patriarchal practice. The fact that this Indian woman doesn’t recognize that is to her detriment. She’ll never properly address the situation. She’ll attempt to use a band-aid to cover a gaping wound.