Coolstorybro: The Abortion

This dude knew his g/f didn’t want kids from the get go and is now doing the fish flop online because she had an abortion which he calls ‘non-consensual’, as if she needs his consent to take care of her own body. He also doesn’t understand that a fetus is not a child.

He’s anti-abortion so he doesn’t give a shit about the life of the woman as she’s only a meat vessel for a kid.

When she became pregnant he went off the deep end, constantly talking about the pregnancy, pushing her into the baby section of every department store during every shopping trip, and generally not caring about her at all. You can clearly see that this guy didn’t see her at all. He’s doomed to repeat the same mistake unless he reads this and wises up.

It’s a long-winded story. Be prepared to read.

Disclaimer: I searched through this sub to see if this question or issue had been brought up and I’m sure likely it has at some point so forgive me if I’m beating a dead horse but I’m new to this sub, as well as Reddit in general, but this is an issue that I’ve been passionate about so I was hoping to get some feedback from other men about this.

So lets continue

Several years ago I was in a long-term committed relationship with a woman who I (believed) that I loved deeply, and who felt the same about me. We were like best friends and had great chemistry, on-par communication, similar interests and we were on the same sort of path in terms of goals and dreams we shared.

About a year and a half into the relationship she wound up getting pregnant. We realized this after she missed her period which sent her into full-blown panic mode which only got worse when she took a pregnancy test and it came back positive. In retrospect, I believe that because I showed such an enthusiastic response this probably pushed her away even further because in her mind she was dead set on never, ever having children.

For the first few weeks she played along as if it was going to be alright and maybe having a child wouldn’t be that bad. I tried to comfort her and get her excited about having a child. We both had good jobs, we had a nice place to live, top of the line healthcare coverage and loving and supportive families who didn’t object to us having a child together. Of course we weren’t married but neither of our families viewed that as a problem and just assumed we’d tie the knot sometime in the near future.

I, personally, have always wanted to be a father. Of course, I wanted to be responsible and wait until I was in a situation where I could adequately provide for my son or daughter; and naturally I wanted to make sure I was with the right woman who I felt could be the best potential mother for our child. It wasn’t something I set out to accomplish or something that I’d push on every girl I got involved with for an extended period of time but I will say it was in the back of my mind. I’d always look at a partner’s character to determine whether or not she’d be a suitable mother.

When my ex and I would go to Wal-Mart or some other department store I’d want to go check out the baby aisles and start looking at accessories, cribs, walkers, strollers, etc and it would fill me with this inexpiable sort of joyous anticipation. Plus it felt so good knowing that at the point of my life that I was in, I could look at my bank account and see that I had more than enough money to buy my son or daughter everything that he or she would need; as well as provide for my pregnant girlfriend or “wife-to-be”.

After about a month her tone started to change drastically. She would always ask me if I was “suuure” that I wanted to have this baby. If I thought she’d be a good mother. If I thought I’d be a good enough father. She had so many doubts and fears but I tried my absolute damndest to comfort her and reassure her that it was all going to be okay. Still, I overheard conversations she’d have (I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop but she didn’t exactly make it hard to hear her either) talking to her friends about her concerns and that she was doubting whether or not to keep the baby.

I didn’t want to push the issue because I felt that it would drive her away even more so; I didn’t demand that she push the idea of abortion out of her mind or even get mad at her for bringing it up. I am very, very adamantly pro-life but I can respect her enough to know that it’s something that comes up in some women’s minds especially when they find out about an unexpected pregnancy. I don’t condone it but, out of love and respect for her, I wasn’t going to bash her over the head with my ideologies either.

One day I got home from work and found her in the bedroom in a sort of weird, blank state. Very unlike her as she was always bubbly and full of energy. She seemed despondent and aloof but tried to brush it off and tell me that nothing was wrong. “Nothing is wrong, I’m fine. It’s fine,” she kept repeating over and over. I could always read her like a book and I knew her moods well enough to know something was obviously not fine. I tried to let it go for the rest of the day but something just wasn’t sitting right with me. I brought up something about some crib I saw online or SOMETHING, I don’t remember what it was exactly but it was some random baby item related comment I brought up in casual conversation and she just flipped. Like literally lost her shit.

“STOP TALKING ABOUT THIS FUCKING BABY SHIT FOR FUCKS SAKE JUST STOP! I NEVER WANTED A BABY! I FUCKING HATE YOU FOR GETTING ME PREGNANT! I DIDN’T WANT YOUR FUCKING BABY, I NEVER DID! THERE IS NO FUCKING BABY SO JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

I will never forget that sinking feeling, like all the blood went from my head, down my face and smushed into a big clotted ball that sank down to the pit of my stomach. I thought I was having a bad dream. It felt so fucking surreal. I saw her waiting for my reaction. I could see her eyes tearing up. Her tone changing too. Realizing the truth was out now and there was no turning back.

“What do you mean there’s no ‘fucking’ baby?,” I asked her. Thinking surely maybe she meant that it was a false positive and she wasn’t really pregnant. At the worst, did she have a miscarriage? I felt devastated enough at the thought of her miscarrying but I was seriously not prepared for the words that were fixing to come out of her mouth. Could I have even been prepared for them? Can anyone prepare them for something like this?

“I got an abortion”.

FOUR WORDS. These four words and I felt the course of my life change forever. FOUR WORDS. Even years later I remember the shakiness in her voice yet the calloused undertones. It sounded more like, “I got an abortion?”, you know when a chick says something in a cocky sort of arrogant manner? That tone is only acceptable in terms of, “Ugh, what is she wearing?” or something like that. “I got an abortion” (like it was even a queston?) All I could think about was our trips down the baby aisle, the cute baby shit we looked at together on Pintrest, the conversation with my parents and how excited they were to be Grandparents but how even more excited and thrilled I was to be a Dad, all of the hopes and dreams I had for my future son or daughter and imagining what all that would be like. FOUR WORDS was all it took to break me down completely like a gust of wind to a house of cards.

I couldn’t even say anything. What could I say? Nothing I could say would change what happened. No matter what words I use or how loud I yell or however I might channel my anger none of that would bring my baby back from some garbage can or dumpster back safe and sound to her womb. What was done was done. I grabbed my car keys off the kitchen counter and just walked out the door. She tried to stop me and all I can remember was choking back tears trying not to show that she had completely destroyed me and telling her to just simply, “stay. the. fuck. away. from. me.”

She didn’t test me. I’m grateful for that because honestly I don’t know what I might have done if I had stayed in the state of mind I was in. My child was dead. To me (and I know a lot of people debate about this, I’m just stating from my perspective) she had just murdered my child and attempted to sweep it under the rug or hide it under the floorboard like some fucking Edgar Allen Poe thing until eventually her conscience kept screeching at her like the raven saying “NEVERMORE!” causing her to just come out with the truth. How long had she been hiding this from me? I later found out she had got the abortion a whole WEEK prior to telling me the truth. Seven days of leading me on to believe that she was pregnant. Seven days of pretending she still was. Seven days of saying she wasn’t in the mood for sex. Seven days of going to bed early. Seven days of me being too fucking blind to read the writing on the wall.

I remember taking a drive. I made the mistake of checking my voicemail, which I rarely do anyway; I don’t remember how many calls I had but after about four messages asking about how my ex was doing, how the pregnancy was coming along, what had the doctors been saying, congratulatory niceties and how me and her and the baby were “in their prayers”; I finally threw the phone out the window. I seriously lost my shit. I never had thought so earnestly about suicide in my entire life but I thought that if I killed myself that would be the only way I’d ever get to see, touch or hear my child; the only way I’d ever get to hold him or her in my arms; the only way I’d be able to hear their laugh; all the things I dreamed of, the things I longed for; now all gone, never to happen, never to become a reality. If my child was dead I wanted to be dead too.

Had I already failed as a father? My sworn duty was to protect my child and I couldn’t even do that. Was my child dead because of something I had done? What had I done? What could I have done differently? What difference did it make now? These questions, even now, still haunt me. I don’t quite know what to make of them but every time I read posts or hear people say that in terms of abortion it’s the “woman’s right to choose” and how the “man has no say” all I can remember is that night when my world came crashing down.

I know a lot of you probably aren’t religious and I don’t want to spark any sort of pro-life vs. pro-choice debates or talk about our religious views but for my own sanity and comfort I like to think that one day I’ll get to be with my son or daughter; I like to imagine that they’re growing up, healthy and happy in some better place and smiling down on me; I hope that they haven’t forgotten about me up there because I definitely haven’t (and will never) forget about them. I guess my whole point is in terms of this whole woman’s right to choose vs men’s right sort of context; I know I’m not the only one who has been utterly destroyed when a pregnant girlfriend or spouse went behind her child’s father’s back and got an abortion without his knowledge or consent; without even telling him about it at all.

People joke about how it’s obviously for the best. “Who would want to raise a child with a bitch like that for a mother?” That’s what most of the guys tell me. I’ve had numerous women find some way to blame me and tell me that I must’ve done something wrong; I pushed her into a pregnancy that she didn’t want and so she reacted out of fear and out of being smothered and trapped; that she did the best thing for her AND for me and the child, especially if she felt she wasn’t capable of being a mother. To me these things sound good but it doesn’t stop the pain and it really just adds insult to injury. I’ve only met a small handful of people who even tell me they understand. It’s not like she just took some clump of cells out of her body and tossed them away and then POOF she’s not pregnant. The pain, to me, feels as if I lost an actual child; because, in my mind, I did.

Never before had I felt so betrayed. Never before had I felt such loss, such agony, such intense pain and emotional suffering. But no one listened. No one understood. Everyone just tried to talk me out of feeling this way. The best condolences I got was that, “Well, the baby is in a better place.” Well, fuck me then! If my child is in a better place then I sure as hell better be there with them and what loving parent can even say with a straight face, without choking back tears, without the tinge of regret or the sensation of knives stabbing into the lining of your stomach that your dead child who will never be in your arms or in your home is somehow “in a better place”. It goes without saying that my faith which I once held so dear became very strained and challenged until it was damn near non-existent.

I started drinking heavily, got back into drugs (had been abusing illegal pain killers) and just stopped caring about everything. Naturally, I broke up with the girl as soon as I got back home. It was a split lease so I just let her keep the place. I packed all my shit while she was gone to work, went to the office and paid $1600 (my half of the rent – $400 – for the remaining four months we had on the lease) to avoid any kind of penalties for breaking the lease or her skipping out on me and leaving my credit screwed up. I felt I was at least taking the high road. I was acting irrational but at least I was still fiscally responsible. Besides I had plenty saved up that was going towards the baby fund which obviously wasn’t necessary.

I’ve found it very difficult to trust women at all now. I don’t quite know when or if I’ll be able to reconcile this deathblow, if I’ll be able to heal and move on. I don’t know what to do but I feel like there’s something here, some lesson, something I can take and make into something that might help someone as well as help myself through this loss. So I’m glad I found this subreddit community; I’m glad I found other men who understand clearly how we are being oppressed and discriminated against by radical feminists and their warped ideology. I’m sorry that I’ve almost taken up this entire 15,000 word count limit but I’ve never really been able to get all of this off my chest before so seriously if you made it this far thank you, I mean it!

What I hope to achieve someday, if not through sharing this story here but perhaps through talking to others and fighting for men’s rights; I hope to find other men who have lost children through non consensual abortions which were done behind their back and without their knowledge. Sometimes when I hear about statistics regarding abortion I wonder how many other men who TRULY wanted to be fathers, who TRULY were capable of providing not only an adequate life for their son or daughter but also for the child’s mother, who were WILLING and READY to step up to the plate and do anything and everything that a father should, who were EXCITED and THRILLED at finally having a child to raise and to step boldly into Parenthood who were robbed of that by a woman who got an abortion behind his back. How many other men know that sort of pain? How many of those men are even still alive to tell us about it today? I hope maybe that we might can find each other someday; to offer one another hope, support and healing; and to join our voices and raise them upwards to speak out against the exclusivity of a “woman’s sole right to choose”. It takes two the make a child and it should take two to choose to end the life of that child. I know that I’m just one voice crying out in wilderness of loneliness but I hope that other men might be able to hear my cries, to feel my pain and the suffering I’ve carried and perhaps we can make a difference for other men around the world who share this struggle.

Bro-language is so easy to decipher. The dude forgot about his g/f and only ever talked about ‘the baby’, forgetting that there was a human being right in front of him with her own life’s dreams and goals. He knew from day one she didn’t want kids but stupidly thought if he talked non-stop about ‘babies’ that it would change her mind. He forgot about the human being standing right in front of him and treated her as a receptacle he was only using to make a baby pop out.

He has a breakdown because what he knew all along came true. Earth to dude: Women are human beings, fetuses aren’t. If he stopped flopping around like a fish out of water he might realize this.

Of course, he’s the victim in all this and she’s the ‘bitch.’ Now he’s in the Manosphere with lots of other male terrorists and might become an abortion clinic picketer, or worse, a clinic terrorist. It’s times like these where I wish I could make all men go through pregnancy, just to get a good idea of the pain women experience for almost a year.

The experiment has been done many times but not for 9 months. Men’s abdomens and assholes were strapped with an electronic muscle contractor to simulate labour. They couldn’t deal with even a half hour of the mild pain. The Asian guy in this video had the most authentic experience as he put the electrodes on his asshole. I think he thought it would feel good. What an idiot.

Then there’s this next video from the Nederlands subbed in English, which is much better because you can tell the pain is real and not staged. Only one guy made it through a measly 2 hours. My auntie’s first labour was 24 hours. When I saw her afterward her eyes were completely bloodshot from the pain and pushing. No man has that strength.

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32 thoughts on “Coolstorybro: The Abortion

  1. What a sick freak!

    Dudebro needs correction on many points, but #1 is this: Men do not have babies. In other words, men’s bodies cannot produce them, therefore, they literally cannot have them. For instance, if you have an organ or a tumor removed from your body, it’s your organ or tumor – not some one else’s.

    Women’s children belong to them, not someone else.

    This seems pretty basic to me, but these men have never gotten away from their slavery mentality. You can’t own other people and, therefore, own what they produce. It seems like this would have been pretty well established by now, but clearly not.

    • It’s actually women doing the reproducing, yep. I figured that out for myself one day when I realized that an egg cell is not just an egg cell, it’s the CHILD’S FIRST CELL. It’s got everything that a cell needs to grow and divide, except half its chromosomes. That’s the guy’s job. Supplying the other half of those chromosomes. That’s it. He is indeed passing on his genes, but he isn’t actually creating a new person–the woman already did that and just needs a few more raw materials to finish the job.

      They’re OUR kids. They never were anyone else’s.

      Yes, this has interesting implications for things like child support–all I can say to that is, (1) fight for pay equity; (2) fight for as many sectors of employment as possible to be more family-friendly so women don’t have to struggle so much for child care and can therefore be employed more; and (3) dude, I’m taking care of your frigging genes for you and the least you can do is contribute to their well-being. I mean. What the hell?

  2. Did that woman ever dodge a bullet. I hope that control freak stays single forever.

    Very very young, I had an abortion. I was with the exact same kind of guy. And I have never, ever regretted my decision. A child with that asshole would have tied me to him for life. Even at 21 I was smarter than that.

  3. Possible TMI: I have two children. I love them dearly. I’ve had one miscarriage of a wanted pregnancy (meh, sad, but for the best, if my body didn’t carry to term), one miscarriage of an unwanted pregnancy (happiest fucking day of my life!), and an abortion. Mr.Grump was the father, in the case of the abortion, and he came with me to the clinic and held my hand during the procedure. (he was also with me in the delivery room and held my hand and held my hair back while I barfed when the small grumps were born).

    If this asshat really thinks that an abortion is like losing a living child, he is even more stupid than he appears to be. A foetus is not a child. It is not a living, independent human that has a personality that you can know. It is just an idea, a possibility of a person. I don’t just love my children because they came out of my body and filled my brain with mommy hormones. I love them for who they are, as people outside of my existence (even when they are naughty, and frustrate me. No one gets along with someone else all the time. That is being a human, interacting with other humans and their strengths and weaknesses). That woman dodged a bullet by not having his child. There are more red flags in his post than in a red flag factory. He is a selfish man baby, and I pity any woman who gets involved with him.

    The only “lesson” he should take away from this is that if a woman tells you she doesn’t want to be a parent, you can’t change her mind with social pressure, and baby themed crap.

      • I just don’t want to be that mom, and go on and on about my speshul snoeflake children!

        I can’t imagine a worse idea than forcing a woman to be a mother when she doesn’t want to! There should be a special place in Hell for people like that…

        • And it hurts the kids too! These asshats claim to be SO CONCERNED about the children, then they emotionally abuse them! Even kids who wind up adopted can wind up with a whole lifetime’s worth of issues just from the relinquishment, and yes I do mean at birth, because baby knows that mommy is gone. These idiots still believe kids are blank slates and that’s not at all true.

          • I suspect it’s even worse than that. They don’t see the kids as human. Just like they only see the mother as a baby receptacle, they see the kids as property that they get from the baby dispenser.

  4. Wait a minute. The d00d is in a relationship with a woman he knows does not want children and never tells her that he does, nor that he is adamantly anti abortion? Then somehow she magically turns up pregnant? He tells everyone he knows in an effort to pressure her into going through with the pregnancy. He pressures her constantly. Still she disobeys and defies him?
    We know this story. It is a classic in the abusive asshat attempts to trap woman through pregnancy.

  5. I had to come back and read the rest of this sick dude’s narrative because I couldn’t take it all in one big bite. It reminds me of the first-person ravings of a character in an Edgar Allen Poe story – like the Tell-tale Heart, for instance, wherein a clearly deranged criminal mind is giving the reader his rationale for the heinous acts he committed against an innocent person.

    I’ve read some articles about this problem of men trapping women with pregnancy by sabotaging birth control and lying. According to what I’ve read, it is a much larger problem than is generally believed.

    Men, also, trap women into marriage so they can parasite our labor, our income, our time, use our credit, etc.

    It’s sort of like when the men project their being “fat” on thin women. They like to say that women are manipulators and gold-diggers out to get men for their money when, in fact, they are the “gold diggers” and manipulators.

  6. Sorry for the O/T – HMQ, Did you see this?

    Fat hairy MRA dude (Esmay) welcomes Amnesty International to the Men’s [Human] Rights Movement.

    There’s an article over at Feminist Current, right at the top right now, talking about how many people have left the Amnesty organization.

  7. Hello, House Mouse Queen. Thanks for posting all these illuminating stories.

    As you wrote, he viewed her as merely a vessel. He talks about how much he wanted a baby but never says he really wanted to have and raise a child with this particular woman. Like the guys who talk about wanting “a girlfriend,” he saw her only as an instrument for fulfilling his desires. He might have been fond of her in the way someone can like their phone or have a favorite hammer, but he didn’t see her as a person in relationship to him.

    “I started drinking heavily, got back into drugs (had been abusing illegal pain killers)” BACK into drugs? This sounds like a guy who was serously unhinged from the start, and the woman is lucky to have escaped when she did. Radicalwitch, I like the comparison to a deranged Poe character. It fits a lot of these guys.

    Just after college I dated someone who tried to persuade me I’d be sorry one day if I didn’t have children. (I’m middle-aged now and have never regretted my choice.) He was a different type–a crypto-conservative who wanted to seem edgy and progressive, only going along with tradition because the woman wanted it and he was feminist enough to give in. My own honestly-held radical opinions ended up calling his bluff.

  8. He seems to believe that abortion is murder, but only if the woman doesn’t have the dude’s permission to get it done. He’s not “pro-life”, he’s simply pro-control. Imagine this situation in reverse; if she wanted the baby but he didn’t, she would still be painted as the bad one because then she is supposedly trying to “trap” him into a commitment with said baby. The bullshit “sanctity of life” argument goes right out the window when men don’t want the child.

    All of this emo whining about how “devastated” he was seems fake as fuck. I think it’s all an act. Most men run like hell when they hear the words “I’m pregnant”. Those who seem to enjoy fatherhood are just getting off on the control aspect of impregnating women; they don’t actually like being around children.

    Just recently, I saw somebody (surprisingly, a dude) say exactly this: “If men could get pregnant, abortion clinics would be as prevalent as Starbuck’s”. I fully agree.

    • It’s also telling that he didn’t rebound by finding a woman who does want to be a mother.

      If the devastation was genuine, it seems like that would be the logical conclusion, not him apparently swearing off women altogether. If he felt that loss so keenly, why hasn’t he settled down with someone and had a child by now? It’s been several years.

    • His “devastation” looks more like narcissistic self-pity than true grief for a baby he wanted. It’s also common for narcissists to drink or take drugs, as he mentions he has, to numb the pain of living in a world that refuses to treat them with the deference they feel they deserve.

      And another thing–I’m fed up with men using “non-consensual” to describe an abortion they didn’t want a woman to get, as if it’s the equivalent of a sexual assault.

    • I especially love the way MRAs excuse all their bad behavior with “I’m evolutionarily wired to do this,” implying that their behavior is conducive to reproduction, when THEY DO NOT ACTUALLY WANT TO REPRODUCE.

  9. This guy is a controlling douchebag. Of course she did it without telling him. Can you imagine what he’d have done if she’d told him she wanted to get an abortion? Probably lock her up. I agree with radicalwitch and think more men trap women with unwanted pregnancies than is talked about, especially if they already have children and she doesn’t want any more/wants to go back to school or keep a career going. I remember my mother talking about men she knew who did that to their wives in the days before birth control. It’s always about domination and control.

    Sometimes I think about the fact that I’ve been able to get an education, make my own money, opt out of marriage & children, own property and buy whatever I want within reason and how that was only possible for women in the past 100 years and I just feel so grateful and yet so sad and guilty that worldwide more women than not can only dream of it and are still treated like fucktoilets and broodmares. So many women don’t even think about it, especially when they distance themselves from the f word. It makes me nuts.

    • The insulting thing is that MRAs accuse US of trapping THEM into parenthood. But it’s never really been a trap for a guy. Even if he winds up being a single father he will never be penalized in his employment pay for being a father (most of the sex-based pay gap is between mothers and EVERYBODY ELSE) and people will fall all over themselves to help him, especially the women nearest and dearest to him.

      I’m not sorry I had children but I resent like hell that I have to live out being punished for having them in a culture that doesn’t see women as anywhere near human UNLESS we procreate. I look forward to the day, if it ever arrives, when we can just have kids for ourselves if we want them AND access to the resources to ensure they grow up happy and healthy, no strings attached. Because right now we’re just production units for everybody else… men, church, the state, “society”… and if we don’t produce on command we *and* our “products” are seen as inferior and defective. Yeah, THAT’S a recipe for a healthy society.

  10. “FOUR WORDS. These four words and I felt the course of my life change forever. FOUR WORDS. Even years later I remember the shakiness in her voice yet the calloused undertones… All I could think about was our trips down the baby aisle, the cute baby shit we looked at together on Pintrest”

    Pinterest has only been out of beta since 2011: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timeline_of_Pinterest

  11. I just realised I missed the first chance to mock calloused undertones. Well, calluses are thick hardened layers that form in response to repeated friction, pressure, or other irritation.

  12. Ugh. This guy reminds me so much of my ex it’s disgusting. While I do want children some day, and felt the same back then, I have always openly been pro-choice and my then-boyfriend of six years knew that. He also knew that I didn’t want a child unless it was in a stable relationship, financial stability, etc.. So I got pregnant at a time when A) we didn’t even live in the same city, B) he had a part time job and could only pay rent for a place his family owned, C) I’d only just gotten a full time job a month prior, D) I was working with toxic paints. Even still, I did ask for his opinion before making the appointment, to see if there was any way we could make this work. He wouldn’t give it, so I made the appointment and he and a good friend of mine made a trip to a city three hours from mine, where my aunt lived. He was in a foul mood for the whole weekend, pissed off my friend and aunt. Then he broke up with me several months later, eventually admitting the abortion had been one of the reasons, but also saying he might have broken up with me even if I had kept it. Damned if I did, damned if I didn’t, apparently. The night before the abortion, he placed his hand on my abdomen. I flinched and asked him what he was doing, but he basically shushed me and kept it there.

    Point is, this woman was straightforward from the get go that she didn’t want kids, as I was that I only wanted a child when in a stable situation. That some men choose to ignore the obvious and let their fantasies get the better of them isn’t women’s fault. She’s better off without him. I hope she found a man who will actually listen to her regarding her choice not to reproduce, and I hope this asshole never has another relationship with any woman ever.

  13. I think a fetus is human but to me that makes the right to reproductive choice all the more important. I don’t let any old asshole off the street take one of my kidneys because they happen to be on dialysis and I don’t let any old asshole take a pint of my blood because they’re having surgery tomorrow, I get to CHOOSE and CONSENT to do all that, and consent is revocable too. If a fetus is human all it means is they’re held to the same standard as born humans. I feel no cognitive dissonance about that at all.

    And this is the comment I left there, I can’t stand that guy:
    —–
    You chose to continue a relationship with a woman who you knew never wanted children, and now you are complaining that she followed through and aborted a pregnancy.

    She was a dumbass too if you told her you wanted kids and she chose to have sex with you anyway, I am not totally letting her off the hook for that one, but YOU KNEW SHE DID NOT WANT CHILDREN AND NOW YOU ARE PINNING ALL OF THIS ON HER.

    You’re an asshole.

    I feel not the least bit sorry for you.

    And, on top of that, you’re an even bigger asshole for DEMANDING that a child be born to a mother who didn’t want them.

    Let me tell ya, too, it would not have made one whit of difference if you had offered to take the baby and let the mom off the hook. Babies miss mothers much more than they miss fathers. They hear Mom’s voice much more before birth and they identify with her after they are born. (Ask any expert on child development.) Your kiddo would have missed Mom. It would have scarred them. And then if you had to tell them later that Mom’s not around because Mom didn’t want them, that would have been devastating.

    Quit whining that you didn’t get to control a uterus. From now on, only date women who want kids. It doesn’t make a whit of difference how much money you have if you have not got the sense and compassion to go along with it and it is painfully clear you are short on both.

    Downvote if you want, it’s still the cold, hard truth.

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