I took my week off and feel great to get going again monitoring the hate sites that make up the Manosphere. If you haven’t read the GQ piece yet then do it. It’s a great piece of writing by Jeff Sharlet about the men’s rights conference last year.
Jeff brought along a female friend Blair Braverman who is now being described as a female spy/plant to fool MRA’s into being rapey and creepy. You heard that right. Elam and his sidekick Sage Gerard think that Blair was purposely brought there to bring out the worst of men’s rights activists. All it takes is one fine attractive woman to get the Farrellesque rape-vibe out of MRA’s who think women’s bodies make men powerless.
‘[Blair was] hired specifically to flirt with men and get GQ a story. Since Blair was attractive, I did flirt with her… at first….But we have to acknowledge at least one fact: Blair’s job was to get raped.‘ ~ Sage Gerard
Nothing creepy about that at all.
The other plant was the pedophile who attended the conference who told Sharlet the age of consent should be 12.
‘The funny bit about the pedo is that Jeff in reality “found” him and put him in a car with the Honey Badgers to agitate them. Jeff was also seen ushering Pedobear around, and they rarely separated. AVfM will have a story on Jeff’s odd use of the (guy possibly paid to act like a) pedophile later.’~ Sage Gerard
I wonder how AVFM will excuse their friend Factory whose daughter was raped and he threatened to disown her if she phoned the police? I guess we’ll have to wait.
I’ve told you all I needed a break from the misogyny, rape threats, death threats. However, there were things in my personal life that took up all my time this week. I was sexually assaulted last year and the harassment continued throughout the winter up to about 3 weeks ago. I had to file 2 separate complaints on this male. Both complaints were through the company he worked for although after the second complaint I made remarks to management that I was going to officially file with the police.
Someone told the abuser male I was going to the police and he did what typical abusers do, call the police on me. Men do this to get out in front of an investigation, to make themselves the victim. When the constable visited me she told me that his official complaint, what prompted this idiot to call them, was his ‘worry’ that I had filed a second sexual assault claim on him.
Can you imagine calling the police to waste time over your poor feelz about a complaint you’re not privy to? All complaints to the company are private but entitled dude thinks calling the police to find out what’s in the document is a totally good use of police time and energy.
So I spoke to the constable for about a half hour and she informed me that this dude was playing the ‘nice guy’ as in he acted ignorant about the harassment. I can almost hear the privilege:
‘I don’t know what’s going on officer. She’s just crazy. I was just being nice.’
Isn’t this such a typical thing abusers say? Women are just nuts if they don’t accept sexual assault and harassment by such a ‘nice guy.’
Anyway, the constable also told me the company was thinking of moving him to a new location so he wouldn’t have any contact with me and that he wasn’t keen on that idea. Typical. It turns out the police believed me and not his entitled ‘complaint’ and he was moved. Thank God.
This week I’ve been in touch with a women’s liason worker and we’re moving to file an order of protection. An order of protection is similar to a restraining order.
I’ll be back shortly with more coverage on the Manosphere. In the mean time, GQ came out with an excellent long article on the St. Clair Shores MRA Conference that occured last year. I kinda think it’s a good idea that Dark Horse Swore was refused entry because there were men there that think the age of consent should be 12 and the creep factor was high.
Men Are Not Women
Originally posted on FireWomon:
Sarah Brown is a man who identifies as a woman. He has, according to him, had surgery to remove his external male genitalia. Whether his balls are pickled or not, I don’t know, and nor do I want to. The point is that it’s rather rude to tell a woman to suck your balls. (For the avoidance of doubt, I did not write the post to which he linked, nor have I ever written anything for that site. If I had, I’d own up to it. It’s a good site.)
I asked Cohen whether I was to take his retweet as an endorsement:
I didn’t get any further response from Cohen. Now, if I were him, and I had NOT…
View original 2,974 more words
I’m taking a little time off, well deserved little break from writing. It should only be a few days. If you want to read my last post, it’s quite long and very detailed. I’ve got a new young house mouse I’m caring for and when he arrived and got social with me it I found out just how exhausted I was mentally. Being immersed in so much misogyny and male violence takes a toll on me. I’ve written to some of you personally about this issue.
Being a woman online isn’t easy, especially a woman who confronts the violent, rageful men that inhabit the Manosphere. In the last couple weeks I’ve received rape threats and several other sexually violent replies on Youtube. The misogyny that is thrown my way is sometimes very hard to deal with. Youtube is a horrible place to be if you’re a woman, well, so is every other social online space that allows men to harass, threaten and intimidate without any action being taken to stop it.
I’ve decided to take a few days and relax with my new mouse Buddy. Nature sends things your way when you need it. That’s what I truly believe.
You can still contact me by email email@example.com and send me screenshots and notes. I’ll try to check my email once a day.
~House Mouse Queen
Every month or so the mainstream media outlets do a large report on the Manosphere, the online outposts of Men’s rights ‘activists.’ Every article written by these journalists exposes the misogyny and various online and offline behaviour of men who have come to a unique thought process about society, mainly that society is run by women. In fact, MRA’s have made up a new word for this phenomenon that only exists in their minds. They call it the ‘gynocracy.’ Mariah Blake of Mother Jones wrote a long essay about what many of these men call the father of the MRM, Warren Farrell and his protege Paul Elam who owns the website A Voice For Men, designated as a misogynist hate site by the Southern Poverty Law Center in the US.
Farrell published a book in 1994 called ‘The Myth of Male Power’ which has been re-released in a new online e-book format. The cover of the book features the silhouette of the ass end of a woman in an effort to pictorially explain Farrell’s thinking on how the ‘gynocracy’ works. A woman’s body, he claims, makes men completely powerless in various ways and this leads to things like workplace deaths, male suicide, men fighting in wars, boys doing poorly in school, false rape accusations and so on. In fact, every problem a male has in his life comes down to women’s bodies and how he covets them.
‘The most meanest and depraved of men come out on top, and women flock to these men. Their evil acts are rewarded by women; while the good, decent men are laughed at. It is sick, twisted, and wrong in every way. I hated the girls even more than the bullies because of this.’~Elliot Rodger
Since the publication of Mariah’s piece in MJ, Farrell and his colleague Paul Elam, are really angry. They claim Mariah didn’t focus on the right aspects of the MRM. Two articles   and a one 1 hour long video have been produced by Elam and Farrell to respond to Blake on what they call a ‘man hating’ article.
Dissecting the video complaints I will show you that Blake wrote accurately about the MRM. Elam and Farrell have nothing to complain about. I realize that most people who follow the Manosphere, like I do, understand the dishonesty of Elam and Farrell and know that what comes out of their mouths are bold faced lies meant to rile up their male audience. Elam, on his hate site A Voice for Men, will even point his male readership to the offending articles so they can swamp the comment sections, filling it with what I consider even more proof that the authoress was correct about Elliot Rodger’s similar ideology to the MRM. If there’s one general rule I’ve witnessed in the Manosphere, it’s the epic use of strawmanning but the most noticeable is the contradictory positions these men hold.
‘If I can’t have it, I will destroy it. That’s the conclusion I came to, right then and there.‘~Elliot Rodger
Before I delve into this I will say that there are a small handful of women who call themselves Men’s Rights ‘Activists’ but they are few and far between and the men surely outnumber them in the amount of online output and direct personal attacking of women these men deem ‘misandric’ or ‘man-hating.’
Paul Elam accused Blake of saying that Elliot Rodger, a young man who went on a murderous rampage in California, was part of his website AVFM and then went on to argue that strawman. What Blake actually said was this:
‘Two weeks earlier, a sexually frustrated 22-year-old named Elliot Rodger had gone on a suicidal rampage in Santa Barbara, California, killing 6 people and injuring 13. He had left behind a chilling 137-page manifesto suffused with a bitter misogyny and language commonly found in men’s rights forums. “The girls don’t flock to the gentlemen. They flock to the alpha male,” Rodger wrote. “Who’s the alpha male now, bitches?’~Mariah Blake in Mother Jones
Clearly, Blake never said Rodger was part of the MRM or Elam’s site but in order to get his readership angry at her, Elam simply lied about it.
Now comes the proof that Rodger held the same beliefs as Elam and his compatriots. In 2014 Elam held a Men’s rights conference in Michigan. One of his featured speakers was Stefan Molyneux, a rabid libertarian who believes in what he calls ‘defooing’ which is the notion that children who are angry with their parents should cut the parents out of their lives completely. Molyneux thinks women aren’t sleeping with ‘nice guys’ and are ruining the world by sleeping with assholes. Sam Seder featured Molyneux’s diatribe on his Youtube show. Molyneux’s video catalogue includes titles such as ‘No Excuse for Female Evil’, ‘Female Laziness: The Story of Male Exploitation‘ and ‘Estrogen Based Parasites #killallmen’.
Compare this to Rodger’s manifesto and you’ll see the same ideology. The idea that women aren’t fucking ‘nice guys’ (him) and sleeping with other men is quite clearly the main source of Rodger’s anger. The very first line of Rodger’s manifesto is precisely the same as Molyneux’s idea that women are ruining humanity
‘Humanity… All of my suffering on this world has been at the hands of humanity, particularly women.’~Elliot Rodger
Also, Rodger was a member of a Manosphere forum called PUA Hate. Pick up Artistry is a common topic in the Manosphere. It’s basically a bunch of dudes creating elaborate schemes to get women to have sex with them which are more like rape then consensual sex. They call their various strategies ‘Game.’ Rodger was angry that Game didn’t work for him so he aligned with other males who were unable to sleep with women. This sexual focus is exactly what Farrell claims is the bane of men. Somehow, women’s bodies and the male obsession with them makes men incapable of living a good life. Every ill a man suffers is due to a woman’s body.
‘Finding out about sex is one of the things that truly destroyed my entire life. Sex… the very word fills me with hate. Once I hit puberty, I would always want it, like any other boy. I would always hunger for it, I would always covet it, I would always fantasize about it. But I would never get it. Not getting any sex is what will shape the very foundation of my miserable youth.’~ Elliot Rodger
So you see it’s not a stretch in any way to relate Rodger to men’s rights ‘activists’. Elam is being dishonest about this valid comparison. In fact, the entire philosophy of these men a la Farrell is that women have all the power because men want to have sex with them.
In a Google hangout, done just after Blake’s article was published, Farrell and Elam talked about the fact that Farrell featured a naked woman on the cover of his book. The analysis went no further. It was simply an affirmation that men are oppressed by their desire for women’s bodies and that sounds an awful lot like Elliot Rodger.
Farrell relayed a story about a man who took a women’s studies class, not to learn anything, but to sleep with what he called ‘independent women.’
‘I’ve heard man after man saying ‘I really like independent women.’ I took a women’s studies class but I did feel it went too far and there’s a woman in the class I really had an interest in and I think she had an interest in me too when we were beginning to flirt or go out with each other but I spoke up about this and that was the end of my potential, being able to make myself attractive to her. And that’s really tough.’~Farrell
The horror of not being able to sleep with whichever woman you want! Rodger had the same problem and like MRA’s he blamed women for it.
To further the cognitive dissonance, and to soothe himself, Elam insists that the founder of Mother Jones was really an MRA, like him, who understood that women’s bodies make men oppressed.
‘Mother Jones understood, like the woman in the classroom, that women wield tremendous power. That’s why Warren put the [woman’s]silhouette on the cover of his new edition of the Myth of Male power of a woman’s posterior because it was a homage to the fact that if you look at power between the sexes, oh man, it’s certainly not as simple as patriarchy.’~Paul Elam
This is the kind of severe cognitive impairment I can’t help pointing out. While these men think a woman not sleeping with them is a great oppression, like Rodger did, they then claim they’re actually helping men through activism.
‘It was all fueled by my wish to punish everyone who is sexually active, because I concluded that it wasn’t fair that other people were able to experience sex while I have been denied it all my life. I started to have the desire to create a world where no one is allowed to have sex or relationships. I again saw that as the perfect, fair world. Reproduction can be accomplished without sex, through artificial insemination. Sex is evil, as it gives too much pleasure to those who don’t deserve it.’~Elliot Rodger, Manifesto page 65
MRA’s, like Rodger, hate what they call ‘blue pill’ men. These are the men that have sex and relationships with women. AVFM is notorious for not only attacking women but attacking other men they consider ‘blue pill’ or ‘manginas.’ The mangina reference is interesting because the blue pill manginas actually get up close and personal to vaginas while red pill MRA don’t. A vagina is related to women who are viewed as weak by MRA’s. It’s a gendered insult for one man to call another man anything related to a woman. MRA’s tend to use a lot of sexual innuendo, lots of references to vaginas, which they don’t usually have access to. At any given time you can look on the featured articles on AVFM and you’ll see that when Elam isn’t attacking women, he’s attacking other men who don’t share his hatred of women. It’s exactly what Rodger did. Rodger also hated men who had relationships with women.
‘Addison treated me like a lowlife every time I hung out with them, and he kept bragging about the girls he met at parties in Malibu. I indignantly accused him of lying, as that was what I wanted to believe. He was only amused by my envy. I then found that Addison deleted me from his Facebook friends list out of the blue. This was the last slight I would bear from him, and I subsequently sent him a hateful Facebook message in response. I then viewed Addison as a bitter enemy of mine. He truly was a disgusting and treacherous little bastard.’~Elliot Rodger
Let’s do a quick look at AVFM and see what’s headlining there. Let’s see if there’s any ‘activism’ to help men and boys today. Currently, the top 3 articles have nothing to do with men’s issues. All three articles are about bashing PZ Myers, a self proclaimed feminist ally of Freethought Blogs, bashing Cenk Uygur of the Young Turks because he interviewed an MRA and showed her to be ridiculous, and an article by a black man bashing other black men who love women. Even the side titles at the top are devoid of discussing any issue males face. The bashing of anyone who doesn’t share AVFM’s misogynist world-view is standard practice but it’s mostly women that are targeted.
In the effort to rewrite bad press, Paul Elam indulges in fairy-tale explanations as to why the mass media didn’t tell the ‘truth’ about the MRM. In the case of Blake’s article he claimed she couldn’t write a truthful article otherwise the feminists would attack her and she’d have to take down the article. He even went as far as to say MJ would lose stock and funds if Blake ‘told the truth.’ This might be a reference to Gamergate, a male mob that targets female gamers and developers for abuse and sends emails to various companies to convince them to cut advertising funds to various gaming sites that publish support for women in tech.
Warren Farrell had some interesting analogies in response to Blake’s article.
‘Women see themselves as ants and men as elephants which gives them an excuse to hurt the elephant as much as they want.’ ~Warren Farrell
This isn’t the first case of Farrell’s questionable comparisons. In an earlier Google Hangout with Elam and Golden he compared a man paying child support to being a rape victim. I suppose one could say this is Farrell’s modus operandi: making strange comparisons in order to claim women are the scum of the earth. In fact, The Myth of Male Power is really just a long-winded group of metaphors in an attempt to make men’s position in society comparable to women’s lower status.
‘The equivalent of a woman being treated as a sex object is a man being treated as a success object.’
― Warren Farrell
The quote above is from Myth of Male Power. Anyone can see which of the two is powerful and which isn’t. When you’re simply a repository for a man’s penis you are hunted, prey. You’re an object whose lower economic status funnels you into abuse and male violence like prostitution and pornography. Successful men are able to wield power and buy those women. It’s a failed analogy.
Farrell’s metaphors call into question his feminist credentials which he flashes to the media often in an attempt to gain credibility. The fact is, Gloria Steinem, once she figured out he had some strange positions, refused further contact with him. Farrell admits this openly. He relays a story about a television appearance he did with her. He claims she conspired with the producers to end the show because he brought up the pay gap. Afterwards, she wouldn’t return his calls and the show was never aired. Instead of taking this gracefully he went to Toys R Us and bought a plastic phone and sent it to her. It seems Farrell doesn’t take rejection very well. Rodger didn’t either.
Rejection issues is a major theme for MRA’s as it was for Elliot Rodger. Not being selected by women, as outlined by Farrell, seems an instant path to misogyny and even murder. Rodger may have never visited AVFM but he certainly held the same ideology. Blake’s expose was completely accurate no matter how much Elam and Farrell cry foul.
Happy Valentine’s Day to the women of the world!
I got this from an MRA on Youtube today and thought I might share it. Appears that disagreeing with straight white males makes them remember the massive oppressions they suffered while in feminazi concentration camps. This guy was in the Dworkin unit of the camp where he was taught not to make rape jokes and forbidden access to porn for a week. He escaped before final self-awareness could be achieved.
I now proclaim Valentine’s day to be a Male Holocaust Remembrance Day. We shall gather to mourn the great loss of everything great and masculine. The elimination of rape, battering, street harassment, stalking, murdering of women, manspreading, the pay gap, and buying/selling prostituted little girls will be particularly missed. Just think of all the wonderful rape jokes those evil feminazi’s took from the world. It will be one giant manhug.
This comment was left to me on Youtube. It’s a perfect example of rape culture if the first thing out a man’s mouth is to threaten rape.
Many of these men have criminal records for sexual assault, stalking and so forth. This is why they close ranks around other abusers, like Elam.
UPDATE: Thanks to one of my readers for giving me the identity of the man who sent this comment. I cannot publish it here but it will be used for police records.
Paul Elam’s daughter relayed a story to Buzzfeed about the time she wanted to go see Grandmaster Flash while she was visiting her father in Texas. Elam responded, calling it ‘nigger music’ that he didn’t want to hear.
So which is it?
I think this is Paul’s way of justifying his actions. Deny, then make up some story about how it’s culturally appropriate to call African Americans ‘niggers’ because ‘1957’ and ‘Texas.’
Makes total sense.
Thanks to MissAndry for the tip.
There was only going to be one of two defenses to the Buzzfeed article that confirmed what most knew about Paul Elam already: a deadbeat dad many times over, a drug and alcohol addict that got arrested several times, a racist, a child hitter (of a boy), a rape apologist, and a financial leech of women.
In less than 24 hours Elam’s response on AVFM had over 200 comments and rising. Looks like Buzzfeed hit a nerve. Elam even admitted that after the story was published he had a sleepless night.
After a long, emotional and sleepless night last night, I am no less committed to seeing this through than I was the day before. Nothing has changed, except perhaps that some of you know me a little better now.
The first responses were spewed forth by Dean Esmay on the comment section of the article itself. He basically counter attacked Adam Serwer.in a classic case of projection and then leaned on the Gamergate mantra of ‘journalistic ethics’. It must be understood that Elam was contacted to give his side to Buzzfeed and chose to be an asshole mostly saying it was none of their fucking business.
‘Server, who showed himself to be filled with rage and contempt towards the attendees of the International Conference on Men’s Issues, refused to answer questions himself…It’s clear what Server’s motivation here is: revenge, using Buzzfeed as his mouthpiece, for the fact that he was exposed as a hack journalist 6 months ago on our pages…Serwer’s co-authored it with a hate-filled feminist with a record of making unsubstantiated allegations herself.
Dean doesn’t understand that journalists are the ones that ask the questions and the interviewee responds. We can dismiss the ‘hate-filled feminist’ as she’s not the racist deadbeat dad who hits little kids. This is an example of the entitlement MRA’s have. Also, it’s not really evidence of hack journalism when the source is AVFM. Just saying.
On AVFM it’s a similar yet different response. Sage Gerard, who has the highest rated comment basically just shot the messenger and reassured AVFM’s donators that Paul isn’t rich. Gotta keep that money flowing in.
Oh, and god help us all if Paul decides to run A Voice for Men for a living. If something eats 70-80+ hours of your week, you can’t hold down a fucking job on top of that. Where do you think his food comes from? Do you think a unicorn delivers a feast to his house every day? To you fucktards who hate Paul so much, remember that I’ve been in the man’s house. He doesn’t have gold hubcaps, bitches and hos funded by us suckers, it’s just like any other lower middle class house.~Sage Gerard of Zen Men
I’m sure all the Skype conversations with Elam’s big team he never pays takes 80+ hours a week. His daughter admitted he spent all his time on the computer trolling. So no, you can’t hold a job down when all you do is sit online and write angry misogynist screeds and collecting money while your arse goes numb. Well, maybe you can.
‘When Elam was on the road, he would entertain himself by participating in what Bonnie called “internet troll wars” about men’s rights. Elam has said that he “started AVFM from a semi truck, with a laptop, driving 10, 12 hours a day.” (“I’m a determined person,” he told BuzzFeed News.)’
Not determined enough to get a job and stop making other men pay for his computer trolling time I suppose.
But there’s a bit of a twist here. Elam sent an email to his daughter in 2010, when the site was up and running and he was raking in money every quarter, hand over fist. The email to her:
‘I am struggling to find work, living off Stacy and have used up every dime of savings. I am in a state so bad the only thing I can compare it to is when I was shooting dope. I have buried myself in writing because it numbs the pain and makes me think of other things, like instead of feeling like a failure.’
This is very odd since in June of 2010 Elam started AVFM but was editing Men’s News Daily just prior. Did MND collect donations? How much money did Elam make from that?
In 2011 Elam was having very successful fundraisers on AVFM and when you read the following, you understand why Elam didn’t go back to work.
When Stacey’s father died in 2011, the couple moved into the apartment her father had been living in, according to public records. Eventually, Bonnie said, the two weren’t even dating — she called them “roommates” — Bonnie said he was driving Stacey’s car and spending Stacey’s money. He didn’t go back to truck driving.
Elam had several fundraisers in 2011 starting with 2 fundraisers in February. He had another one in June where he asked for 5 thousand and another in December where he cleared $5,600. There’s no way to check on how much he actually made but with most fundraisers he usually reached his goal and then some. So the question must be asked: why was he making his daughter pay his phone bills when he was 1) living with a woman who had an income he was living off of as stated above and 2) was more than likely fundraising on MND and definitely doing it early 2011?
The other fact is that while he was living in an apartment in 2011 he quickly used the donations to buy a home where he now lives. This new home is downplayed by another MRA leech Sage Gerard, who runs a campus MRA group called Zen Men. Sage Gerard just cleared $7K when he lives at home. Add on another $13K just prior to the KSU gathering and he’s got a lot of money. He claimed the money was to keep him from dipping into his tuition and to feed him but he lives at home.
‘One month without your support, and it would be impossible to keep up with my tuition payments, let alone feed myself.’
I suppose it was for food?
His daughter clearly knows he’s a leech and doesn’t contribute anything financially in his relationships. Drug and alcohol addicts take and take and of course in Elam’s case I’m sure he had to shell out expenses for his multiple arrests which his girlfriend probably paid.
And finally, in 2014 after collecting hundreds of thousands of dollars, Elam sent his public representative Dean Esmay on a major news network with a missing tooth and a horrible suit when he could’ve easily helped another man with a few thousand dollars to fix his tooth. Other men besides Elam, paid for that too. The bill was a measly 3K.
Many of you already know about this but for those that don’t Buzzfeed found Paul Elam’s daughter and one of three of his ex-wives. They spoke with pseudonyms. Turns out Elam is everything I expected him to be. He has a criminal record for drugs and sleeping on the street due to drug and alcohol addiction. He’s a racist, a deadbeat dad who took care of ZERO of his kids, hits children, and even blamed his ex-wife for being raped by one of his friends.
He calls rap music ‘nigger music’ and he hit his grandchild, a son, because he dared open an expensive refrigerator that Elam bought with his hundreds of thousands of dollars he scams from his MRA audience. So much for loving boys.
His daughter says he’s a leech, that he leeches off women and doesn’t work except troll on the internet and he can’t keep a steady job. He really has his audience fooled with all the ‘advice’ he gives about fatherhood seeing he hasn’t spent a day fathering his children except to allow his daughter to pay his phone bills.
Paul Elam is trash. Anyone who donates to this guy has a screw loose thinking he’ll go mainstream and get his ideas accepted when he’s got a criminal record and his ex wives fear for their safety if they talk.
I can only hope ‘Bonnie’ got a conscience and is doing this to protect the many women he’s harmed and intends to harm. If so I have a warm thank you to her. If you’re reading this Bonnie, you may email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
To ‘Bonnie’ :It must be very difficult to accept these things about your father. It’s hard coming face to face with this truth but you are very brave to speak openly about him and potentially save many lives.
Elam responded to the piece and I’ll save you all the trouble of reading the writings of someone so self absorbed and dishonest. He basically said ‘bitches be lyin yo.’ He also promised more attacks. I suppose that’s what abusive men do when confronted with their abuse: abuse more.
That was it.