Coolstorybro: The Deadbeat

MRA’s are some of the most irresponsible shits ever to grace the planet. When they are about to have a paternity test, you know the test they’ve been whining about for years, they decide it’s better to leave the country and go live in Asia to avoid financially taking care of their children. These are the same assholes that hate the State for ‘taking care of baby momma’s’ while they’re flying off to foreign countries and leaving the State to care for the deadbeat’s kids.

He says he never wanted kids but sure didn’t think about that when he kept having unprotected sex. Dude is pretty dumb.


Here’s where shit hits the fan, and where I need confirmation of what my options are. On a trip back home to visit my family (US, TX) I met a girl who I thought might actually come traveling with me. I spent about a month with her, and we had sex probably 6-7 times, without a condom, because she said she was on birth control, and also had cervical surgery after which the doctors told her she would not be able to bear children.

We ended up getting in a huge fight, in which I realized the way she handled things was not healthy, and the way she fought was not healthy. A lot of red flags were raised, and I decided to stop communication. I blocked her in every way I could (phone, social media, email) mostly because I DID like her and didn’t want to re-engage because it was going to be unhealthy.

She managed to get in touch to let me know she’s 9 weeks pregnant – and she wants to keep it. The last time we had sex was 7 weeks ago. However, she slept with someone else 6 weeks ago. There’s a pre-natal paternity test scheduled this week. In the process of scheduling said DNA test, she absolutely lost her shit, much like the fight we had – except worse. Threatening all kinds of legal action if I am the father, requesting I sign away parental rights, etc etc.

The thing is… before I found out about all this, I had already booked a one way ticket to South East Asia.


So here’s how I view what could happen (someone is going to say lawyer up – but I literally do not have money for this).

  1. Find out I’m not the father – Freedom, Maury Dance.
  2. She Miscarries – Freedom. (She miscarried her first pregnancy and has had cervical surgery in the past that could affect the fetus coming to term.) No Maury Dance.
  3. I am the father and I stay here, and she takes me for every dime (I don’t really want a part in this child’s life. I’ve never wanted children and I’m not cut out to be a father. I know this, she knows this.) I live like a homeless person paying for a child I will never see and since I don’t make any money, I’ll probably end up in jail (whcih is silly – because then she’s technically paying for me via taxes.) No Maury Dance.
  4. I leave the country and never come back. Change my name to “Archer”, use my 10-year valid passport to gain citizenship under a false name in a country that doesn’t have US Extradition Agreements. Also get a vasectomy.

P.S. I know not to sign away parental rights if I’m not the father. Not to go to the hospital/doctors appointsments, and not to sign anything saying I am the father (birth cert or otherwise.) And I also understand that if I don’t pay, I could face fines, revokation of licenses, renewing passports, imprisonment.

TL:DR; I might be the father of a batshit crazy fling, but I don’t have the resources to handle child support – are these my only options?

Edit: Yeah, I know I’m a fucking idiot for getting myself into this situation, and I vow I will get a vasectomy, and never have sex again because it’s possibly the biggest danger to my livelihood than anything else. I will become a master of masturbation.

Yeah, the only thing left to do is sulk off to a foreign country and leave the child financially destitute and the mother too. Excellent showing of manhood fella! You’re so fucking responsible!

Let’s hear it for MEN’s RIGHTS to be a deadbeat!


12 thoughts on “Coolstorybro: The Deadbeat

  1. I like how he keeps saying he’s broke, and yet he can afford a plane trip to Southeast Asia (and probably travels quite a bit, by the sound of it).

    My parents divorced when I was about 4 years old (and for all the asshats out there who claim it’s always the woman who initiates this, wrong…he was the one who filed for divorce, not my mother), and I rarely saw him after that. He would only visit about once every 5 years, and not because he really wanted to, but because my mother would call him and DEMAND it (she wanted me to have a relationship with him). We received a grand total of $100 per month child support payments (YAY! BIG MONEY!). Right before I turned 18, during one of his rare visits, he reminded me that he wouldn’t have to make payments anymore after my birthday. Nice guy.

    So, I basically had a father who wanted nothing to do with me, and a mother who did take care of me but was very abusive, and no siblings. I have no relationship with either of my parents anymore. I’m pretty much the ultimate loner.

    • I saw that too. He keeps whining he has no money but managed a plane ticket to Asia.

      What’s funny is that paternity testing is something MRA’s go on about constantly. Here she is, ready to get one, and he’s ready to split the country.

      Men are selfish and deadbeats.That’s men’s rights for ya!

  2. What I got out of what he wrote is that she wants him to sign away his parental rights. Why would he be upset about that? Sounds like he’s making something out of nothing. And why would any of these champs who think women are all lying liars *ever* have sex without a condom?

  3. Are you surprised that so many men are ignorant of the rule about how many contradictions can be included in any given paragraph before the BS meter hits pants on fire and the readers eyes roll? Kewel story Bro!

  4. Does this dumbass think countries regularly extradite for child support payments? I guess I don’t know one way or another, but I’m extremely skeptical. At a minimum, U.S. law enforcement isn’t going to bother. Getting a murderer extradited is difficult enough.

  5. I always get surprised by the lack of responsibility that men exhibit. If you’re not ready to be a father, you use condoms if you’re having PiV sex. Also, as usual, the idiot doesn’t even consider the weird inequality that there is no reproductive control option similar to the birth control pill for men.

  6. I meet these assholes all the time in China. Most of them also fall into the “I love Asian women” club (which I’ve written about before). Their underlying misogyny, which they’ve carried around with them since childhood, comes out full force after experiences with ‘castrating, uppity, Western b****es’. Their solution is often to run off to Asia where there are ‘real women’ who understand their place, who know who the head of the household is, and who make these dickfaces feel ‘like a man’. They infest online Asian forums where they circle jerk about their conquests. I avoid Western men in China like the plagues that they are. And they tend to avoid me. I feel bad for the locals.


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